When My Exes Do Well

I always feel partly responsible for my ex-boyfriends’ success. For, I was there when times were tough. No money, no job.  Just a dream. I was there when no one quite understood what it was that they were seeking after. I was there when no one cared about their plans for success.

Some time has passed since my exes and I have gone our separate ways. It didn’t work out between me and them for various reasons, but one thing will never change.  I will never change the way I feel about their ability to fulfill their dreams. I still smile when they tell me about a business plan that has finally come into fruition, a graduate degree that has finally been earned, or a promotion that has finally been achieved at their jobs.

When we were together, one thing that my exes could always depend on is my ability to support and encourage whenever its needed. I have been a shoulder to cry on when they’ve failed. I have been a voice of encouragement when they were feeling discouraged or a comic relief when they felt like crying.

While some women become bitter when their ex becomes successful, I rejoice. I understand the role that I played in their success, so when they succeed, I feel like I’ve achieved something great also.

I know I’m not the only one who feels like this.

S&T Readers, how do you feel when you’re ex achieves a goal that he was diligently working towards while you two were dating?

2 thoughts on “When My Exes Do Well

  1. I think it’s always a good feeling to be part of someone’s success especially when we where there at some point to support and encourage.

    When it comes to the exes though, I think I have a bitter –sweet feeling. Sweet because I am so proud they finally reached their goals but a little bitter because I kind of wish I was still around to rip off some benefits of that success.

    So to all the successful exes, if you have dated a woman/man who truly supported you during tough times, was a shoulder for you to cry on or a constant motivation, and believed in you, give her/him a call to tell them how much you appreciated them for all the support even though things didn’t work out. I wouldn’t say no to a nice gift though…lol… Am just saying!!!


    • You bring up a very good point about being around to reap the benefits. It’s like “I’ve invested so much in you and now someone else gets to reap the benefits! So not fair!” Lol at the comment about him giving you something.

      I also wonder if an ex contacted you to say “thank you, I appreciate your support during the tough times,” would bring confusion. I wonder if it would give a woman false hope that the relationship would work out. There are some people that I had to cut loose and if they ever contacted me again, there would be major problem, especially if I were married.

      Each person that I have ever encountered in my lifetime have put an indelible mark on me, which has helped shaped my perspective and experiences. Some have played major roles and others have played a minor role. Some were around a long time and others around for a season. I appreciate all the work that my exes have invested in me and while we were together, the best that I could, I let them know it.

      Thanks for your comment.


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