5 Reasons I Did Not Attend Your Wedding

5 reasons I didnt attend wedding2014 is here and if you’re like me – a woman in her late 20’s – then you have been bombarded with save-the-dates, I-said-yes text messages, and phone calls from friends asking you to be apart of their wedding. Not to be a Wedding Scrooge or anything; you are happy for your friend’s new-found happiness and the fact that they will celebrate with a $20,000 party, but at the same time, you realize that saying yes to every bridesmaid dress will cost you money that you just can’t afford depart with right now.

For a person who adores weddings, saying no to a wedding invitation is no easy task. In the past, as long as I can scrape up enough money and skip a few meals, I would have been at your wedding.

But this fact is no longer true.

The older I get the more I realize that managing finances is the key to my future. I can’t afford to say yes to every wedding invitation. Attending every acquaintance, co-worker, and friend’s wedding will prevent me from getting a place of my own, paying off my educational debt, and starting a family of my own. I have to be more selective of the weddings I attend. So, in the future, if you don’t see me in your wedding, here are 5 reasons why:

I couldn’t afford it.

Get married on the 4th of July weekend in Turks and Caicos and rest assured that my blessings and well wishes will be sent via email, Skype, text or Google hangout. I love you, but are you crazy? A trip on a non-holiday weekend to Turks and Caicos is at least $600 can you imagine how much it would cost me to go there on summer holiday weekend?

The last time I heard from you was in middle school.

I blame it on nostalgia, but it seems as though people who are about to get hitched reach for their yearbook from 15 years ago, dust it off and call everyone who signed it. Thanks for the invite, but I’m unable to attend your wedding. I am still trying to figure out who you are. Happy wedding though!

We’re not close.

Weddings are extremely inconvenient.  To attend a wedding, one may have to purchase airfare, stay in a hotel, take time off from work, and spend money on a dress and other items and services. They are only meant to be enjoyed by people who play a substantial role in your life, not busybodies who only call when they want something or a co-worker who throws you under the bus any chance they get. So, unless we are close friends or related, I unfortunately have plans and will be unable to attend your wedding.

You didn’t invite me.

To keep their wedding within a budget, many couples limit their guest list. I understand that, for weddings are expensive. What I don’t understand is for some women’s audacity to invite the same people who did not make the cut for the wedding to the bridal shower. So, I was not worth the $50 to cover my plate, but you’d still like me for me to get you a gift? I’m a bit offended. I understand why you didn’t invite me to the wedding, so please understand why I didn’t attend your bridal shower.

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2 thoughts on “5 Reasons I Did Not Attend Your Wedding

  1. LOL *claps* I’m glad you wrote this and I can TOTALLY relate!

    I actually had to tell someone that I’ve known since middle school that I couldn’t be one of her bridesmaids. #1 we aren’t close (just known her forever) and #2 I couldn’t afford it. It was a difficult conversation but I’m glad I had it with her.

  2. Good for you! No, really, kudos. Saying “no” is not always easy. It was a difficult conversation, but I’m glad you had it to; otherwise, you would have ended up broke and mad, while your friend is in wedding bliss.

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