No man will ever love or marry you. There is something wrong with you that’s why you’re STILL single. You’re not smart enough or pretty enough. Look at that stomach, you need to lose that gut. You don’t dress nice enough. Look at you… a hot mess. You don’t deserve to be happy. Your hair is ugly in its natural state; I don’t know why you don’t perm it. You’re not competent in the workplace that’s why haven’t landed your dream job. You’ll never achieve your goals. You’re unintelligent, incompetent, and critical; I don’t know what your friends see in you.
My abuser hurls these insults at me constantly, morning, noon, and night. The StrongBlackWoman in me attempts to combat these insults but the WeakBlackWoman in me succumbs. She believes these words.
My abuser is with me 24 hours each day and 7 days each week, never takes a vacation. The whispers in my ear are oftentimes overwhelming. And although they HURT, I believe they’re true.
My abuser has been a secret until now. This is the first time I’ve ever told anyone about my abuser. The first step to recovery is admitting that you have a problem. And so, Scribbles & Tostitos Readers, allow me to introduce my abuser.
My abuser is Me.
“My Abuser” was originally published on October 23, 2012. Let’s celebrate Mental Awareness Month by examining our own self-talk. Click here for the story behind the post and here for tips to combat your “Abuser.”
Scribbles & Tostitos 
Very interesting and deep. I thi k we all battle that inner demon and why some people end up with that person who confirms there inner thoughts. It’s bold putting this out there but the point of self love starts when you are real about your vulnerabilities.
N
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Agree 100%
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WOW!!! This is very profound! We definitely all go through this battle at some point in our lives.
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Wow, that’s powerful. Believe me when I say you’re not alone.
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[…] post is Part III of my “Abuser” series. To catch up on the series, click on My Abuser and My Abuser (Part II): Story Behind the […]
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[…] how you said that “No man will ever love you?” Well you were wrong. Do you know awesome you are? Do you know how many men would love to have a […]
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[…] you from exercising or saying no to that pint of Haagen Dazs icecream. You eat to suppress that negative self-talk. Then, you may go on a cycle of stressing, eating, and gaining […]
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This was so beautiful and I made me go emotional!
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Thank you
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Wow. Deep.
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I so appreciate this post. This is something that I’ve been dealing with for years and even more recently. You’ve just given a voice to those who have been conditioned to press on while secretly battling their own internal war. You’re amazing. Thank you for sharing your story with such a powerful, honest message.
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Thank you. I’m so glad you were able to connect with this piece.
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There’s so many emojis I want to use right now, but I can’t because I’m at work on my computer and well.. there’s no emojis. So first, I jumped into combat mode and I was going to find this “guy” and with all my power hurt him for hurting you. Then when you said “my abuser is me” I fainted and said well you can’t just go off and slap anybody now. All jokes aside, I love this post and it was needed. So many times we fall victim to abusing ourselves that we don’t even know we’re doing it. I for one am guilty of it. From the natural hair to my baby weight. I thank you so much for this powerful and eye opening message!!!
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We are our worst enemies…😢
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😥😥
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This is a test, but it got me over here to read this post again. This is awesome. It also got me to click the “story behind the post” and I have to say, you are awesome, too. Hope this finds it’s way to your comments and not your trash. You deserve to be recognized, Yaa Yaa!
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I got it! Thanks Tom! You went straight to my comments box! But all jokes aside, that’s really weird that your comments don’t appear. Do you think your account was compromised?
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It doesn’t appear to have been, and it SEEMS to have corrected itself after two perplexing (and frustrating) days. Fingers are crossed that the danger has passed! 😄
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Just that little bit alone had me hooked! Wow! It’s amazing what we can do to ourselves. I loved this!!!
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Thank you!
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