On The Time He Asked Me To Go Out with ‘His Wife And Kids’

wife and kids photoGoing on a date was the only item left on my bucket list during my senior year in college. It was Spring semester of my final year and all other items on my task list had been checked off. Now, if I could get this one checked off, I would have left feeling pretty accomplished.

We worked in the school bookstore together. Ever since my first day working there several months ago, he always showed me extra attention. It was quite obvious that he was interested.

He had asked me out several times, but I always gave him an excuse, I’m busy; I’ll be doing my hair. I’m going out of town, but this one particular Friday morning, I agreed to go see a movie with him. His face lit up. He was smiling harder than I had ever seen him before. “How about about I bring my wife and kids?” he asked.

“Excuse me?” I asked him, shocked about what my ears were hearing.

“How about I bring my wife and kids?” he repeated.

I was stunned. Have you been so shocked that you couldn’t even move or respond, for how is one supposed to respond to such an outlandish request. First of all, what kind of man would flirt with his co-worker for several months and when she finally agrees to go on a date with him, he asks her if it’s okay to bring his wife and children? I was over him at that instant. I gave him the cold shoulder the rest of the day.

Later that evening, my phone rang, it was Mr.-Wife-And-Kids. I ignored the call. Then, Mr. Wife-And-Kids sent me a text that read, what time are we going to the movies? Finally, I figured that I would be the mature adult and return his call.

“Hey! So, what time you wanna hit up the movies?” he said excitedly.

“I don’t think I want to go to the movies with you and your wife and kids,” I said.

“WHAT?!” he exclaimed.

“Yeah, you asked me to go to the movies with you, your wife and kids today. Remember?”

Silence took over the conversation for several minutes, until he shouted, “Yaa Yaa, what are you talking about? I don’t even have a wife or kid!”

He paused for a second, and then continued, “I was asking you if you had seen the movie with Chris Rock called, “I Think I Love My Wife.” I’m always forgetting the names of movies.

“Oh.” I responded feeling like an idiot.

“You know, Yaa. Never mind. You don’t seem like you’re interested in a guy like me. You should have just asked me what I said, instead of jumping to conclusions. I’m not that kind of guy.”

And just like that, the only item on my task list during my senior year in college was left unchecked.

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